


you, in my hometown

by BabyVillanelle



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Idols, Angst with a Happy Ending, Based on a Taylor Swift Song, Childhood Friends, Famous Bang Chan, M/M, Non-Famous Felix, Pregnancy Kink
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-28
Updated: 2020-12-28
Packaged: 2021-03-11 00:14:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,787
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28376022
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BabyVillanelle/pseuds/BabyVillanelle
Summary: Chris doesn't know how to explain to Felix what it feels like to have crowds singing the songs he wrote, and Felix has too much pride to follow Chris to Seoul.-An idolverse au where Chris left home to become an idol and Felix stayed behind in Sydney.
Relationships: Bang Chan/Lee Felix
Comments: 24
Kudos: 198





	you, in my hometown

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this in one afternoon because I couldn't stop listening to "'tis the damn season" and thinking about these boys. 
> 
> This is set in a universe where only Chan, Changbin and Jisung are idols.

  
Chris understands why Felix stays behind. He doesn't blame him. Felix is in school, two more years left at university, and Chris doesn't know what his plans are after that. 

Sometimes he wants to ask Felix to come with him, especially when they're here, and he's on his back and Felix is everywhere, all over him, inside of him. All he can smell is Felix, sunscreen and salt. He wants to beg him to get on the next plane back to Seoul, to take up space in Chris's too big, too empty apartment in Gangnam. 

But he can't. Chris's life in Seoul is too full, and he won't make Felix shrink himself to fit. 

So instead he just pulls Felix deeper into him, clings to his neck, whispers the things he knows will make Felix unravel. Make Felix gasp and sigh and sink his teeth into Chris's shoulder and come.

Chris is surrounded by beautiful people all the time now. Music shows where he meets artists he's looked up to his entire life. Company parties with groups of idols. He still secretly thinks that Felix is the most beautiful person he’s ever seen. 

Back when Chris had first moved to Seoul, the first holiday he'd spent at home, the first time he'd ended up back in Felix's bed, Chris told him that he could be an idol, that he had the looks for it. And Felix had gone so quiet that Chris was afraid he'd fallen asleep. 

"Lix?" He'd asked, craning his neck to see Felix's face. 

"Don't," he'd said, sad and small. 

That had been back when Chris still had rose-colored glasses on about the whole industry. Fame was still a gift, a blessing to have fans chanting your name. 

He thinks he gets it now. 

  
*

  
So he comes home for Christmas and he stays with his family and he opens gifts and he smiles and cooks dinner with his father and he kisses his mother on the cheek. And then he climbs through the hole in the backyard fence like he's not Bang Chan, golden boy of JYP Entertainment, like he's just Chris. Swim captain Chris, high school honor roll Chris. Felix's Chris. 

Felix lets him in the back door wordlessly and kisses him in his kitchen. 

He tastes like home, like prom and getting drunk on the beach and kissing until the sun rose. 

Time. 

They never have enough of it. 

Chris lives for these moments once or twice a year where he comes home and Felix is there, waiting. 

Chris knows that there will come a time, soon, probably, where Felix won't be waiting. He'll find someone else, someone who will stay. 

He goes home and he pulls Felix into him and he feels complete. 

And three days later he goes back to Seoul and his boys and his music. And he leaves Felix in Sydney. 

*

And then something changes. 

Chris gets hurt. 

It's not even serious. A month off. But. 

There are no more crowds. No more signs with his name on them.

He's alone a lot. 

He hates it, hates it because he thinks too much when he's alone. He knew, when he started this, that it would end. He just didn't know what it would feel like. Now he thinks he does. 

Now every time one of them stumbles in the practice room, Chris's heart is in his throat, panic clawing at him. 

He can't sleep. 

He works harder than before, stays up all night in his studio, keeps yelling at Jisung and Changbin and then feeling miserable about it. 

Every mistake is blown up, enhanced in his mind: _What if this is what ruins us, what makes us lose it all._

If all of this goes away, what does he have? 

An empty apartment and ten years in an industry that doesn't give a shit about him. 

*

It's Changbin, in the end, who asks the right question. 

_What do you want, hyung?_

And he knows, is the thing. He’s always known what he wants. That's never been the problem. The problem has always been that there are two answers. 

Maybe in another life he could have both. Could get onstage and feel like a god and look over and see Felix smiling back at him, hair slicked back with sweat, smiling so wide his cheeks ache. 

" _Hyung_ ," Changbin says, eyes full of patience and forgiveness that Chris doesn't feel he deserves, "You can make music without being _this_."

Without being an idol. Without everyone’s eyes on him, all the time. After everything that Chris has been through, it sounds nice. Now that he's seen what fame does to even the best people, the way it works it's fingers into you until you burst open like overripe fruit, the very worst of you spilling out for the whole world to see. 

"What if just my music is not good enough?" 

"It is."

*

He buys an apartment in Sydney. 

It takes time. It takes a lot of time. 

But Felix is there. 

Chris waits for it to feel like a mistake, but it never does. 

He misses his life in Seoul sometimes, especially at the beginning. He misses the studio with Jisung and Changbin, misses the stage, the fans, the _feeling_ of being adored. Of feeling larger than life. 

But none of it compares to the look on Felix’s face when Chris told him that he was staying. Just for that, Chris would have traded all of it and more. 

And he finally has a future. A future that doesn't end in failure or injury or burnout. 

A future he can plan on.

And someone to come home to. 

*

Home is this, in bed, with Felix. 

Chris holds Felix's hips and rocks him back and forth on his cock. He always gets so boneless when he's in Chris's lap. Something about the angle, how deep Chris can reach. 

Felix bounces slightly, his fingers scrambling for purchase on Chris's chest. 

Chris tightens his grip, grinding up into him and holding him there. 

"So perfect, baby," Chris says, and Felix keens, his pretty forehead wrinkled in concentration as Chris tries to reach even deeper inside the clutching heat of him, "All mine?"

Felix nods hurriedly, his fingers coming up to Chris's shoulders, bringing their faces closer together.

Chris can see every one of Felix's freckles like this, dark and light brown spots scattered across his cheeks. His eyelashes curl over them so nicely. 

"Y-yours," Felix says, voice a low growl in his chest, "All yours. Want- wan-"

Felix flushes, bites his lip. 

"Want what, sunshine?" Chris asks, pushing sweat-damp hair out of Felix's eyes. 

"W-want everyone to know," Felix says, rolling their foreheads together, "That I'm yours."

_Fuck._ Chris bounces Felix in his lap particularly viciously, makes him squeal. 

"How should we show them?" Chris asks, and Felix shakes his head, speechless with his eyes screwed shut and lips parted as Chris fucks up into him over and over, "Hmm? I can leave marks all over you. Here?"

Chris cranes his neck up, nips carefully at Felix's jaw, sucking a kiss into the skin afterwards. 

"And here?" 

He presses his lips to Felix's chest, looks up at him through his eyelashes. He sucks the skin there in between his teeth and Felix gasps, wraps his arms around Chris's head and holds him there. 

Chris lets go and flicks his thumb over Felix's nipple just to see him squirm, to feel it when he tenses his muscles around Chris. 

" _M-more_ ," Felix says, quietly, scratching at the back of Chris's scalp. 

"My baby wants more?" Chris asks, sliding his hands up Felix's back, feeling the flex of muscles there as he works himself up and down on Chris's cock. 

"Perfect boy, take me so well," Chris fawns over him, "I'll give you anything, you know that. What do you want?" 

He hesitates for a moment, skates his hand down Felix's left arm, tangles their fingers together, lifts their hands up and out to the side. 

"A ring?" Chris asks, almost joking, but Felix chokes around a whine, ears pinking, " _Ohh_ , a ring? You wanna be my husband, love?" 

" _Chris,_ " Felix whispers, embarrassed. 

"I love you," Chris says, kissing gently at Felix's plush pink lips, "You're gonna be such a good husband."

Felix, hand in his, matching rings, a house near the beach with a dog, kids. Kids. Felix is so good with them, so gentle and patient, he'll be such a good parent someday. 

To _Chris's_ kids. 

Something heats up in his stomach as he thinks about it. 

His Felix. His Felix, holding their baby, his baby, _Chris's baby._

Chris fucks him faster, clinging to him, hands slipping on sweat-slick skin. Chris rubs a palm over Felix's lower belly, feeling the way his soft skin rolls over hard muscle. He flicks his eyes up to Felix's face, nuzzles against his ear. 

"Gonna fill you up, make you mine, yeah?" Chris asks, pushing down on Felix's stomach. Felix tightens around him, lips parting in a desperate whine. He's nodding again, frantic, and Chris wants to give him everything, to take all that he is and offer it up to Felix, "....fill you up with babies."

Felix shouts as he comes, spilling across Chris's belly. _Oh._

Chris flips them over, cages Felix in against the bed, hovers above him, working his cock in and out with shallow thrusts. 

"Did you like that?" Chris says, smirking slightly as he kisses Felix. Felix kisses back lazily, his eyes hazy.

"Yeah, fuck," he growls, his accent a low, sleepy drawl. He cups the sides of Chris's face and bumps their noses together, "Want it. Get me pregnant. Want your baby, Chris, please. C'mon, _please._ "

It's the whine that undoes Chris, has him driving his cock hard into Felix and coming deep inside him with a rough groan. 

Chris comes back to himself, sweaty and panting, sticking to Felix, and he's impossibly, desperately happy. 

*

"Were you serious?" Felix asks later. He's sitting on the edge of the tub in one of Chris's shirts while Chris brushes his teeth, "You really want to marry me?" 

Chris looks at him incredulously before spitting into the sink and rinsing his toothbrush. He wipes at his mouth and sinks to his knees between Felix's thighs. 

"Yeah, I think I do," Chris says, and Felix looks down at him with such exquisite tenderness, kisses him on the forehead, "Is that okay?" 

Felix laughs and wraps his legs around Chris's torso, clinging to him. 

"I've been waiting for you to ask me that since the fourth grade," Felix says, and Chris thumbs at the dark patch of freckles under his right eye. 

And it's enough. It's everything. 

**Author's Note:**

> [twt](https://twitter.com/bloombloompowie)


End file.
